Imagine

"You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one.

I hope someday you will join us.."

**

Imagine - John Lennon

I have an active imagination.  It keeps me entertained daily.  When my boys were little, I worried: they didn't have an imagination.  (they were very little at the time).  That fear has long subsided, along with the insane argument "He's not letting me pretend...."  I only wish I could exact that power over someone.. 

This morning, I overheard the following:

Liam: "Aidan!.  Look, the mouse was found here this morning (a mouse ornament lying face down on the wood floor."

The deceased ornament

Aidan, "Yes, I definitely believe he was murdered.  I'll start interviewing possible witnesses."  (Turns to the sea urchin-looking ornament' "Did you see anything last night?" (Turns to Liam) "The sea urchin isn't saying anything, but I know he's hiding something."

The silent sea urchin

Liam coming from around the Christmas tree holding another mouse ornament.
Liam, "Look, the dead mouse's brother, JoJo has just arrived.  He doesn't speak, he just smiles."

JoJo the mute

By this time, I couldn't stay quiet any longer.  I had to get involved.  This was WAY too fun for me to miss out on..

Jenn, "Bring Jojo over here.  Let me handle him." (Liam brings Jojo over to me.) "JoJo, Thank you for coming in.  I'm sorry to hear about your brother.  Do you know anything that might help this investigation?  Do you understand what we're dealing with here?  YOUR BROTHER IS DEAD.  WIPE THAT STUPID SMILE OFF YOUR FACE!"

Then the door bell rang..  Our voices went back to normal.  The improv session ended.  

I'm not entirely sure where this plot line derived from.  We monitor their tv. What can I say?  Other, than, I'm also aware now that we have quite a few mice ornaments.  Which makes me wonder: Why is it okay to put a cute looking mouse on the Christmas tree, but I don't want ANY live ones around me, in my house, garage, etc.. EVER...


**I didn't include the last line [and the world will live as one] purposefully.  I don't think it will happen, ever.  I am a Christian; I believe in everlasting life with God.  I believe I will live in peace after this world.  It's why I can laugh off the small injustices we face daily.  This world is temporary for me.  My only wish: that others would find Christ's peace and love, that has filled in my life.  

I've Seen It All

I've Seen It All

I've see it all, I have seen the trees

I've seen the willow leaves dancing in the breeze

I've seen a man killed by his best friend,

and lives that were over before they were spent.

I've seen what I was, I know what I'll be

I've see it all, there is no more to see

Bjork (with Thom Yorke)

Remember the first time your heart hurt?  

I remember walking home (1st grade).  A little girl (second grader) yelled out (about me)  "look at how ugly that girl is!  I bet she doesn't have any friends, because she's so ugly!" 

I remember my heart breaking finding out my 'first love'* cheated on me, more than once [*what I considered love then, and now, are considerably different]. 

I remember the guttural pain; learning my birth mother kept me a secret from her family and has no intention of meeting me.

I, like millions others, have my September 11th story.  I wept, and wept for them.  On the ten year anniversary, I didn't watch the specials.  I still remember.

Over the past decade:
I've been to 3 grand-parents funerals.  
I attended a funeral for sweet Ava, who fought CDH courageously for 47 days.  Her mother's courage, still inspires me.
I watched an entire sanctuary fill up, to say goodbye to an amazing man, father, husband, son, and friend.  He left his wife, and 3 kids behind.  His kids are such beautiful souls.  I know he is proud.
I watched a close friend prepare herself and her family for her mother in law's passing (breast cancer).

Then I saw the news on Friday, and I feel - like -  I've seen it all.  I don't like what I see.  I don't want to see anymore.  I only want what matters & is truly important.  I want to live my life to please God.  If I don't have Him, I have nothing.  I pray I show God's love through: words, deeds, thoughts, and actions.   I pray for the health & safety of my family, and my friends. 

I pray for peace and comfort for the families devastated in CT. 

The Boys are Back in Town

Guess who just got back today?
Them wild-eyed boys that had been away
Haven't changed, haven't much to say
But man, I still think them cats are crazy

The Boys are Back In Town - Thin Lizzy

I don't like to brag, BUT....
Last week, I had the ENTIRE week off (and I don't mean Monday - Friday, I'm talking Sunday through Sunday.  My AMAZING, SELFLESS, TIRELESS, SAINT of a mother in law ASKED (yep, you read that correctly - SHE ASKED if the boys could spend the week with her & Pop-Pop.  What could I say?  I don't want to disappoint the sweet woman, so, I did what any selfless mother would do: I had my husband pack their clothes, and we said YES!
  
Did I get the boys' rooms cleaned out and organized?  
Did I get my projects completed? 
Did I get my craft room cleaned out & organized?

I didn't do much of anything; LOVED every minute of it!  Know what else? I didn't feel a snitch guilty, either!  See, I don't feel bad for taking care of myself.  Growing up, I distinctly remember my mom leaving for some 'her' time; when I'd ask to accompany, it was an unapologetic: No!  Know what?  I totally get that!  I realized early on (in motherhood), if I didn't take care of myself, I had little to give.  I love those boys too much, to neglect myself.  


My advice to new mothers: Take care of yourself without guilt.  As mothers, we take/feel enough guilt for 3 lifetimes. (We can cover that in another blog post, aptly named; Crucify)     


What did J & I do?  We reconnected.  Turns out, I still really like him. :)  We watched the Olympics, went to a few movies, drank our dinner (not every night), and laughed.  I know a week without kids isn't practical for every couple, but I highly recommend a few kid-less nights, every once in a while.  

The first verse of Thin Lizzy's song: Boys are Back in Town, describes today.  They walked in, gave us obligatory hugs, and fell right into normal.  They haven't changed - don't have much to say (unless you're talking Legos & superheroes).  While I loved my vacation, I'm glad my boys are back in town!